A Peaceful Lament

Peaceful Lament. 

Life is like the ocean.
Days where the sun beams steady upon us,
Reflections gazing far and wide of the majesty surrounding us.
The waters are refreshing, soothing to our weary souls.

But as tides turn and storms brew,
Sometimes as in a swift turn of the night.
The waters can overcome us.
Waves coming in quicker than we are able to take on.
Drowning begins.

With the surprise of the waves,
Hitting us time and time again where we least expect them to rise.
Before we are able to catch our breath another wave hits.
Bodies bruised, beaten, lungs shattered, breath suffocated.
We lose a bit of who we are.
The lament settles deep into our bones,
Agony cries out.
Questions arise within the darkness of the soul.

The identity we once knew, being reconstructed, tested, pursued.
The strength we thought we once had, washed away within the consistent rising of the tides.

For when the waves are tossing, true north tends to get lost within the waves.

But, true victory rises in allowing the waves to take you where they may,
To let go of the fight for control and let the current thrust you into the mystery of the journey.
To let the tears flow, the anger work through.

To release fear like fireflies, the release allowing the illumination into rest.

For we can trust that the creator of the very waves themselves has not forgotten us yet.

And as we let go, we learn to let peace in.
Within the darkness, peace settles.
Vastness comes in like a rushing wave. yet peace reminds us of a Creator who created the very waves that threaten our drowning heart.
We need only to lay down the fight, to let the emotions come, to get to the deepest spaces of lament.
The raw honesty in our bones allows us to look up and see the stars shining in the darkness.

It is the deepest spaces of lament that bring us into the fullness of hope.

For when God is all we have, we discover He is all we have ever truly wanted.
We discover there is no storm where His supernatural peace cannot reside.
The waves cannot rise so high that He cannot calm them.
The storms cannot rage beyond His capacity to sustain them.
The expanse of the suffering cannot surpass His level of faithfulness.
For Jesus will walk through the storm to bring the peace.

He will mark the very waves we thought would drown us as remembrance stone to sustain us.

To be the strength in us when we thought there was only weakness left.
To bring joy when only doubt and despair encircled our mind.
To be the way when we thought there was no way.


For as we turn our eyes beyond the waves,
We experience peace like the night sky touching corn fields,
Pink dust sprinkling the earth settling into the depths of blue,
washing us back to the waves.

And this time, we let out our sails and ride the waves.
The lament is still here, still heavy worn with sorrow and grief.
But as the surrender coexists within the storm,

As sails are raised,
We learn a peaceful lament.

Breaking Through

BREAKING THROUGH

Here I stand before fogged glass.
Reflections unknown, muddied, confused.
The lies of insignificance circle,
They are easy to fall into.
Easy to believe the thoughts of my jealous mind when clear sight has been precluded.
Its feels almost natural to be here again before my own fogged glass.
Darkness knows me well.
Significance, purpose, radiance, those are hard to choose,
Hard to believe over my life.
It takes effort,
It takes work to push through the confusion and fog that come so naturally,
It takes work to let the light in.

Darkness is easy to hold,
For no one sees me in the shadows.

Standing before fogged glass, the room is dark, loneliness high, spirits low.

But I choose the fight today, I choose to press in.
I punch through the glass,
Illusions falling to the ground,
Loneliness and doubt shattering below.
The punching takes risk, it takes pain to be sure.
For work is to be had here, I do not deny it.
It is painful to choose to stand up to the insignificance story in our mind.
Hands bloodied, bruised and broken,

Risk, pain and hurt chosen,
For the sake of healing, light and joy.

As the glass before me shatters, it creates space for light to flood in.
There is a beauty in the breaking.
My confession of the lies spill over,
The truth sets me free.

Hands open now, reaching towards the light,
Blood dripping down.
Pieces of glass dripping off the knuckles,
The bloodiest space of all.
For aren't our bones the deepest spaces we hold the lies?
They invade and dry us up,
Widdle us away until we ache deep into the core of each and every movement.

From here I break wide open and let the wounds come,
The space provides room for the healing.
Bones come alive,
Set free from bondage,
Broken open to be healed in love.

Slowly, I begin to pick up the broken pieces,
Now colored with my very juices pouring out.
Pick them up,
Create a mosaic,
Colored with suffering for the sake of compassion.

I can see clearly now.
The light rests upon me.
The mosaic forming with more depth of color, space, and size,
I hold it to the light.
The light bouncing, dancing through the broken pieces.

Majestic divinity occurs here.
Art created.
This story becoming masterpiece.
A healing piece of restoration for this world.

The broken pieces, broken reflections, fogged and muddied,
Now have become radiant, full of beauty.
For everything is being made beautiful again.

Today I chose risk,
Today I chose breakthrough,
Today the shattering became the beginning to the beauty.

Tomorrow might I choose life,
Life to the fullest,
Life in the honest.
A life not afraid of the breaking.

Here I stand now,
My reflection known.
I see the rainbow colors of light bouncing on me.
The light I never knew that was there.
That has been here all along.

I only needed the courage to risk the breakthrough
to become who I have always been.

Pain for clarity,
Wreckage for purpose,
Open hands to cup the light,
Hold it close and pour it over my life once again.
The breakthrough.

Hope Grasped. Lackey Family Session; NWI Photographer

Hope Grasped

Hope grasped onto. 

Arms tenderly wrapped around children, 

Holding them close.  

Delicately embracing the beating of of her heart. 

There is a beauty about her. 

Her children call her fearless, bold, determined, caretaker, truth teller.

Willing to risk it all for the sake of the one. 

With an infectious laugh and ears open to listening, 

her joy overflows, abounding in goodness. 

This light she carries, though many days threatened by the dark, will not be defeated, 

for she is a warrior.  

Fighting for truth for her family, her community, her own heart,

enjoying togetherness. 

Speaking words of truth, words of affirmation over each other, 

bringing power and hope to the honor of the spoken word. 

As you stand on the mountaintop together, 

may you be bold enough to take on new adventures, new seasons for the sake of hope. 

Hope grasped onto, never letting go in each and every season. 

Setting hearts ablaze. 

I had the Immense honor and privilege of photographing this beautiful family recently.  To day their hearts poured over in love, in togetherness, in faithfulness and tender support would be an understatement. Time is such a gift, and my time with the Lackey family was one of the greatest gifts! 

Letter to the Lackey Family: 

Time with you is a rare gift.  You have the power of honor each other with your words. Your family is filled with incredible joy.  You stick together, fighting for each other; through the hills and the valleys you are one.  There is value in the togetherness, in the time. You reckognize this season is ever changing and the small grasp there seems to be to hold it still.  Yet, even amongst the wavering, there is peace, there is unspeakable wholeness.  There is a firm foundation resting here, the heartbeat of your family that holds you together.  This mold is unique, strong and lasting. Keep pressing in to each other. Keep loving each other, even on the hard days.  Keep making time to listen, for it is so incredibly worth it!!  You guys are simply incredible!! I hope you know what a rare gift you are to this world.  Thank you for allowing me to be just a small piece of your grand story being written.  

Ben- you are so so loyal and kind.  I believe you will be a quiet leader in your days ahead. Humbly showing up each day.  You are filled with goodness.  You have so much to give. You feel this world, and do not let that scare you.  For compassion for others is one the greatest gifts we can posses.  I truly believe you are destined for some incredible journeys! 

Nate- Quiet and reserved, yet I can see a beacon of light coming from you.  Your smile can light up any room and there is quite a bit of creativity welled up inside of you. You are an amazing caretaker for your sisters.  You process the things of this life, and I cannot wait to see where that extraordinary gift takes you!! (And ps, I hope you keep your hair forever, because it is amazing!!) 

Katie-You are going to do great things in this world.  You are a doer.  You lead your sisters so so well. May you never forget what a gift you are.  Life itself spills out from you, as you serve and encourage, and care for your sisters.  You are a beauty for the world to see; not only physical, but also of the heart. Keep loving others well, for this is how we change the world.  Extending love, one person at a time. 

Addy- So fun loving and spunky!  You just go for things, full force, all in.  But within this, you are kind and compassionate.  I cannot wait to see where this takes you!  Continue to be exactly who you are, for it is what makes you the most beautiful version of yourself! 

Anna- Lover of life and lover of your brother Ben! :) I adore how much you admire your older siblings. You surely have some good ones to look up to!! But remember, that there is an amazing treasure within your own gifting as well.  You are loyal and you have so much wonder of heart built up in you.  Never forget the beauty and wonder of this world.  Bottle it up dear one and pour it out to the world. 

Mark- A great listener and a great leader.  I love that in speaking life and truth over Kelly you mentioned her greatest joy to exist within birthing your children.  You see beauty in sacrifice, and surrender, in the gift of new life, as you are speaking into the lives of others and showing them the gift of life itself.  Your boys look up to you in the most radical ways.  Your girls cling close, knowing they are in a safe space.  Your words of affirmation over Kelly were so powerful and poignant.  I hope that wherever life take  you next, you will remember this gift of speaking life into others, into your family, into the love of your life. 

Kelly- Where to even begin.   There was a connection I immediately formed with you.  Your compassion and grace know no bounds.  The way you gently cupped Ben's face and spoke words of affirmation into him is one I will never forget.  You, like Mark are a life giver.  In gentleness you are also willing to step out in courage and take risk.  You would do anything for your children, and they know this, they know it well.  You remain close in truth, yet allow distance to grow.  There is this beautiful space to feel welcomed, encouraged, blessed and challenged by you all in one.  Challenged to step into that in which we are called to.  Your gifting know no bounds.  You have a heart that spreads to each soul you meet.  You are a great treasure.  Stand in this beautiful space of holy surrender, for your family is watching and they are being given the greatest example.  Thank you for allowing me into your sacred space.  For your family truly is sacred.  Keep holding them close and soaking in this time.  Each day is a gift. 

Grateful and blessed with my time with this family.  May we remember to grasp onto hope in every season, never letting it go.  And may remember the power of our words.  May we spread hope with us wherever we go. #hopedoers

~Rooting you on from here. 

Laura 

***In honor of hope, in honor of spreading this power of words into the lives of others, we have an event taking place, June 9th.  We are hosting a tea party, where we will discuss this idea of hope, as well as create an intimate space for rest, for fellowship, for good food and intentional filling up.  We would love to have you be a part! Simply email TheAdvocateHopeShop@gmail.com for more info!! 

Would you like me to photograph your family?  I would love to bring hope and joy to you in whatever season you are in.