THE Stay at Home Mamas; You are so much more than JUST a mom!

A Stirring of the Heart

So, something has been stirring around that I have heard a lot of within some of my friend circles and it is truly something I feel passionately about that we are moving in the wrong direction in within society. 

There is a current rising trend within stay at home moms as of late to pursue entrepreneurial ventures on the side as well traditional motherhood.  Here me in this, I clearly think there is nothing wrong with that, as I myself run my own photography business.  However, I think that we as women do need to make sure we are specifically called to what we are stepping into and recognize that it is indeed a job, it is indeed a sacrifice, and it does indeed take away from your family life. And if there is not a financial need for it, or a specific calling into it, then is it the right thing to be stepping into?

More than JUST a Mom

Some of my amazing friends were talking to me about how they were JUST a mom, as if they were not enough within our busy new culture being a mom.  But let me tell you, it can be the most beautiful season and the most beautiful thing to JUST be a mom.  You have the opportunity for one on one time with your child.  You are the only one who can love like you do, you are the only one who can build them up emotionally like you can, you are the only one who can care for them and tuck them in and bounce with them and cradle them and nurse them and swaddle them and correct them just the way you do.  YOU are their mothers and you are making an eternal impact, an eternal difference within the lives of your children.  And that is enough mamas.  Shouldn't that be enough for us?

I was recently listening to a podcast, Risen Motherhood, in which they were interviewing Ruth Chou Simons.  What said has stuck with me for several weeks now.  She mentioned that "just because a door is opened, just because you CAN do something, does not mean that you SHOULD."  She has an amazing hand lettering company with gorgeous prints and just released a brand new book.  She has 6 boys and looks like she is doing it all.  But she is honest about not doing too much when her boys were younger so that she could invest the time.  I would highly suggest this 20 minute interview with her to any mamas out there.  It was truly so rich with good stuff! It has been mulling over and over and over again in my head.  Just because we as woman CAN do something does not mean that we always should. 

We Cannot Do It All My Friends 

And I just see this concept being pushed on moms everywhere, that motherhood alone is not enough, that you have to be doing something on the side to be the “cool” mom, the “hip” mom.  Or, it is broadcasted that stay at home entrepreneurs can do it all.  And my friends, it is just not true.  I am here to tell you.  I LOVE what I get to do.  I love the stories I get to document and the amazing families that I encounter, however, please I ask you to forgiveme if I have ever portrayed that this is the IT life.  I have to make a sacrifices, for it truly is a business.  There are MANY nights I am up until midnight, missing time and snuggles with my sweet husband as I edit and get all my business things in order.  I cannot attend all the playdates or church functions or be all the places, because I have a business I am running, and I have to be at home a lot to work.  My husband and mother-in-law watch the kids a lot for me as I shoot sessions or attend meetings.  And for me, this works.  I love beingable to photograph families, making extraordinary of their lives, bringing rich hope to their walls and advocating for orphans around the world.  It is a part of me and bleeds out of me, and I truly think I am a better mom for it.  BUT, goodness you guys it comes at a lofty price.  No one person can do all the things nor should they.  We can only be affective within the few things God has gifted us well in.  

THE Stay at Home Mamas

So friends who are “just” stay at home mommas.  Can we please change the jargon??!  For goodness sakes, can we please instead say that we are THE STAY AT HOME MAMAS.   Let’s form an amazing new tribe for you shall we?  Can we rejoice with you and sing over you and build you up and encourage and affirm this hard task you have before you.  You are being intentional with your children.  You get to spend this time with them, and soak them in.  And not to say you shouldn’t also have girlfriend time and enjoy girls nights out or all those things.  By all means PLEASE do!  You need it sisters!  But also, recognize the weight of the amazing job you have placed before you.  May we as mothers get off our phones, stop comparing to all the things we think we should be of those around us, and instead step into the unique calling we have right between our two feet.  May we be fully present right where we are at, and be all there.  Be all there with your kids mamas.  (I am speaking to myself here too! ) Be all there, abide with the Lord, give your kids attention and love and I can promise you, when you look back, you won’t be upset at all, for all those things you were never a part of.  Let’s get intentional, let’s get small with our focus, and let’s do exactly what we are being asked and just not look to all the things we “should” be doing in the eyes of the world. 

So, whether you are a full time mama, a part time mama, a stay at home entrepreneur mama, or THE stay at home mama.  Consider it a blessing.  Use your influence.  And THE Stay at home mamas.  I see you.  I know its hard.  I know you don’t get the recognition you deserve and that your days are spent teaching and giving grace over and over again.  It is so stinking hard.  But can you be brave?  Can you have the courage to step up and own your job, own your place and be crazy excited about it?! Time is one thing we will never get back.  So, let’s STOP believing we need to squeeze in more things, and instead let's do the things we can in front of us well.  

May we not be defined by our jobs or our thoughts of the type of mother we are, but rather in who we are in Christ.  May our identities rest there and there alone.  May we rock at being stay at home mothers and rock at being working moms.  It is all just as significant.  It is all beautiful and messy and hard.  It is all work and sacrifice.  So, let’s run after our specific missions well and rejoice with our sisters on all platforms.  And in doing so, in joining this mission to be THE stay at home mamas, may we foster healthier families, and more loving homes filled with care and attention.  Families that are chosen, desired, knit together and valued.  Families that change the world start within the family members themselves. 

~Rooting for you, THE stay at home mamas.  

You’ve got this.  You are so deeply loved my friends. 

~Laura 

Born into hearts; The Fankhauser Family; NW Indiana Adoption Story

Unexpected Blessings

This week I have the pleasure of introducing the Fankhauser adoption story to you.  As I began listening to their story, it became very evident to me, that their story was quite unique, quite a bit different than the stories I have encountered thus far, and yet every bit as powerful and beautiful.

Now, the Fankhauser's on top of having a unique adoption story, also have a unique factor in their family in the fact that both mother and father are named Jamie.  :)  So, to be able to keep matters clear I will title Mother Jamie as Jamie (M) and Father Jamie as Jamie (F). Jamie (M) and Jamie (F) have 3 beautiful daughters, Brooke, Brianne, and Ava.  Brianne is now married to Carson. 

The story began in 2000 when Jamie (M) began feeling a call upon her heart to adopt.  Jamie (F) did not feel called to this at first, but in time, he too could not shake the feeling that adoption would be in their path for them.  After lots of prayer, and just having different things happen around them, they felt called to adopt through Romania.  They went through all the steps, paperwork, and all.  However, after they had been matched with a beautiful boy in Romania, Romania closed it's doors to international adoption.  Romania had promised already matched parents that their adoptions could still hold firm, yet after visits to country, visits to DC and meetings with even the Prime Minister of Romania, they discovered that they adoption process was not going to go through.  

Heartbroken and devastated from the loss of a child, after official word had arrived a snowy morning, Jamie (M) received a call from a wonderful woman who was looking for a home for her  baby girl.  

Stepping Forth in Courage

From here a beautiful relationship formed.  And if you have ever met Jamie (M) than you know, that she is one of the kindest, most patient women that you will encounter.  Jamie (M) and Jamie (F) began to form a relationship with this woman.  They got to know her on a deeper level, and truly see the genuine love that she had for her child.  She truly wanted her child.  She wanted the best for her, but with no Father and not much of any family support in the picture, she was considering placing her child for adoption, so that her baby girl might have the best possible life she could.  And, she found that in the Fankhauser's.  And, in 2006, the Fankhauser family welcomed Ava into their family.  Jamie (M), Jamie (F), Brooke and Brianne were in love. They say that Ava was "born into their hearts" and I don't think could be any more accurate.  Ava's older sister's adored her.  Her Father and Mother lavished their love upon her.  She was and is treasured, and valued to be sure.  

Ava has had the amazing chance to meet her birth mother and her siblings. She knows that she in incredibly loved not only by her parents and family here, but also by her biological mother as well.  She is seen, heard, loved, safe, a breath of life to the Fankhauser family.  She truly is a ball of joy and delight.  Ava can tell you all the details of what is going on around her, and make you feel warm and treasured all at once.  She is a special one for sure, and the entire Fankhauser family knows they won a rare jewel the day she was born into their hearts, into their lives. 

And guys, can I just say what a need the world has for people like the Fankhauser's to be willing to bridge the gap for some of the mother's who feel they don't have other options.  Who feel overwhelmed, incapable, alone and scared.  I so appreciate the way in which they said yes to the call placed right in front of them, even admit some hard rejection.  Saying their small yes to their specific calling, thus changing not only Ava's life forever, but also their other two daughter's lives, and Ava's birthmother's life.  The affect ripples and the love is spread in the sacrifice of saying yes to the right yes before you.  

Rooted in Love 

I love the Fankhauser story and how they are so rooted in their love for Christ that they literally went to the ends of the earth trying to adopt their little boy from Romania, but when all fell through, they could continue to trust that God was good, that God had a plan and that He was preparing them for a different journey, still just as beautiful and more rewarding than they could ever imagine.   Not without struggles and heartache to be sure, but beautiful just the same.  And, something I find incredible, is the way the Lord worked over their situation.  As they were in the adoption process through Romania, they were able to provide their hopeful son with a foster family in the waiting process.  When items fell through with the Romanian government, even though Jamie (M) and Jamie (F) were not able to physically bring home their son, they could rest assured that he was well taken care of, within a loving family, and able to be out of the orphanage.  So, truly, they were able to bless two lives through the process.  What could have potentially been seen as a disaster, was used for good.  God had a plan through it all, and that is such a beautiful thing within adoption.  We are not anything miraculous, we just get to be a part of the plan He is setting forth before us, and go out and make ripples of love to the world.  Yes, it requires sacrifice, but the reward far outweighs it all. 

Advice to those who are seeking Adoption: 

The Fankhauser's suggest to anyone seeking adoption to first trust God.  Trust God in it all, no matter how hard.  Secondly, make sure you really are the right family.  Make sure you are adopting for the right reasons and out of a genuine heart.  Adoption is a life long journey, a life long commitment.  So although a huge blessing, there should be proper intentionality placed on it as well.  And finally, make sure everything is solid at home.  Adoption is a large transition.  It is a huge change, stretching family members, resources, time and attention.  Make sure the important relationships are in check before adding more to the mix.  Everything will run more smoothly in turn.

 

Letter to the Fankhauser's 

The evidences of grace run deep through you.  The beauty of peace washes over you.  You welcome with open arms and satisfy the desires of attention and worth.  You are each warm and kind.  You pay careful attention to love, and to love well.  There is a special connection, a unique gift woven into the fibers of your family.  Your love sinks deeper than just blood and duty, but rather stems out of gratitude, grace and goodness.  You rejoice in each other and smile at the days together.  You are uniquely crafted and yet perfectly designed as one.  You are the perfect fit, the amazing weave.  You are a treasured prize. 

Brooke- Goodness, your love for people and for your sisters runs deep.  You are truly a free-spirit with the kindest heart around.  You make sure everyone is taken care of, without wishing to be in the spotlight.  You are blooming right where you are planted, and the colors shine forth so brightly from the deep roots you have planted.  Keep watering my friend, for your impact to the people around you is a treasured gift. 

Brianne- Your joy, enthusiasm and rich love of hospitality is a so fun to be around.  You welcome those around you with open arms.  You see the incredible details in those around you, you speak truth over them, and rejoicing with them.  You love your husband so well, and have the sweetest compassion towards Ava. Your heart is pure and kind, and I am sure you always light up a room as you enter. 

Ava- Filled with every bit of love, compassion and joy.  You serve so well sweet girl, and pour yourself out for others.  You are this miracle gift to your family.  It is insane how much your parents and sisters (and Carson) dote over you.  You are incredible Ava.  Don't ever lose your spirit of curiosity, and wonder, as it is going to take you on some incredible adventures, and those around you will be blessed. 

Carson- Caring and humble.  You love Brianne so so well, and are truly are the best big brother to Ava I'm sure!! You serve well, and stand firm in tenderness.  You are thoughtful and generous with your words, your actions, and you are such a great fit for this family!  I know the Fankhauser's adore you! 

Jamie (F)- The Best Dad around.  I love how the girls joke with you, and the joy you bring to their faces.  They know that they are each delighted in by their Father.  And the way that you speak to and encourage and uplift Jamie (M) is the most beautiful thing.  Your children understand true love because of the way you treat your beautiful wife.  And you are such a shining example of leading in love and compassion, paving the way for peace within your home. You lead well and your children know their worth and value due to the way you have brought security and attention to them. 

Jamie (M)- There are some people in this life who are just innately special.  Who radiate a genuine sense of beauty about them.  Not by any standards of this world, but by far greater standards.  That of love, and joy, patience and kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control.  There is something so precious in the way you love on your girls, the way you watch over each person in your family, making sure they are taken care of, provided for.  You truly are the Mama Bear of the family, and I know your girls wouldn't want you any other way! 

Thank you guys so incredibly much for being willing to share your story with me! I know that this connection goes far beyond images taken at the beach, and I just feel incredibly grateful to have experienced the loving kindness of your story and relationship. Be blessed my friends! 

~Laura 

Also, just a little reminder that I have some HUGE news to share within my newsletter coming out on Oct. 1st.  Sign up below so that you don't miss out! 

Intentional Love; The Goetz Family; Northwest Indiana

Intentional Moments 

As moments pass and memories fade, I shall ever hope that I have documented them well, as to be able to bring them back into being.

 I deeply want my life to be intentional, well thought over, with my decisions having value and worth.  

To soak in the value of one another is to discover some of the greatest blessings this life has to offer.  

When we have the opportunity to share this life with those we love, those we treasure;

Well, it makes life a rich adventure.  

May we seek the best in one another, give of ourselves for the best in each other and hold captive to the beauty within one another, as to savor the rich blessing before us.  

I don't think we will ever regret the decision to listen and be attentive to those around us.  

Pay attention my friends, for moments are ever passing in time.

May we make them intentional. 

Intentional Savor 

This word intentional is what kept brewing over again and again within me as I documented this gorgeous family.  They are so intentional to show up for one another, to be present, to be content in one another's presence, and to enjoy the moments passing by together. There is always something about a large family that draws me in, but the Goetz family was something deeper, more poignant and reflective.  Drawing me in deeper and closer.  And I think it was genuinely their calm, compassionate attitude towards one another.  This intentional savor and love is certainly something to be admired. 

Letter to the Goetz Family: 

Your love is steadfast and pure, may it remain that way as you grow and mature, and continue developing in wisdom.  Your bonds and relationships with one another is the most beautiful thing, evident through the images and even more so in real time, your deep genuine care for one another runs far deeper than an evening session, but has depth that covers the daily void.  The hard days and all.  You guys are truly steadfast and loyal.  And what an honor to stand behind my camera and watch your magical family unfold.  What an honor and a blessing indeed. 

Rhett- What a cutie you are.  A ball of energy to be sure!! I know you keep your sweet mama busy, but goodness are you so wonderfully adored.  You are truly a ball of joy and you bring energy, life and excitement to the whole family.  Your family lights up for you and is enamored at all that you are. 

Julia- The sweetest thing you are.  You love fiercely and boldly.  You are so beautiful from the inside out.  You are going to be a go-getter, a world changer, a deep impacter for the lives around you.  You are something incredible. 

Cort- My goodness, you are so fun!! I just love your goofy, silly, compassionate personality.  Full of life and spirit, you will consistently bring the laughter and hype to the party.  What a joy to be around! 

Lorelei- Goodness, your heart is so kind and pure.  You are soft spoken and yet overflowing in rich beauty and grace.  You are going to have a heart of gold like your mama.  I see so much of her in you, even though we all just met.  You will love well, and love in wisdom.  You are a valued treasure to be sure. 

Case- You like to be hidden behind the scenes, yet you serve and love so well. It is so evident the way you love Rhett and watch over him as your own.  You are a protector, silently keeping watch over all that is happening and soaking it in.  I am sure you will be wise beyond your years.  You certainly are something special! 

Rece- The kindest leader.  You lead well as the oldest of your humble tribe, but you lead in honest humility.  You lead in love and you lead in service.  You have the best smile and the warmest heart.  What a blessing you are! 

Matt- You are present.  You know the value of everything you have set before you.  You love your wife SO well, and treasure her beyond this earth.  It is so clear that you would do anything for her, and because of the way you love her, it feeds over into the way your children love her.  You are steadfast and trustworthy.  The anchor among the seas. 

Janel- Oh, so full of passion and life.  You have a gentle spirit, but you love hard and love well.  Your children adore you in every way.  They admire and respect you.  For, you are the inspiration for your family.  You bring beauty and dreams.  You are the encouraging force on a bad day.  You are the steady stream, the constant servant, the humble beauty.  Your heart is kind and compassionate.  Something I think your kids get from you.  You are doing SUCH a great job as a mother.  I hope you know that you are chosen, you are beloved, you are a treasure far beyond the weight in this world.  You are one incredible person, and I feel so lucky to have met you!!! 

Be so richly blessed my friends!! 

~Laura 

If you are interested in booking a fall family session, the time is now!! I have about 3 more openings on my schedule!